


can’t miss what i never had

by softyunohours, yijeong



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, donghyuck is profoundly deaf, dream are all deaf, i know asl so some of this makes more sense to me rather than yall, jeno's cochlear implant
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-10-26 15:53:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17748863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softyunohours/pseuds/softyunohours, https://archiveofourown.org/users/yijeong/pseuds/yijeong
Summary: in a few words, donghyuck and his friends are deaf but Mark Lee is a cute rapper and he doesn't know what to do





	can’t miss what i never had

Donghyuk can’t hear, to say the least. His doctor calls it being “profoundly deaf” yet his friends all disagree because being Deaf means he’s not a snobby hearing guy (bitch). He’s never wanted to ever be hearing, but the way others describe music makes him kind of sad. He’s never been sad over music before, he can’t miss what he’s never had! Why now would one might ask? His friends who have hearing aids and cochlear implants all gush over a canadian rapper who’s doing a small world tour. Donghyuk finds him mulling over the fact as he slugs into his and his friends’ meeting place -- just a little coffee shop in the city. Donghyuk isn’t too pleased by the fact that HIS coffee shop (okay its not his but he really likes it) is super busy today. Where’d all these people come from? How is this fair? Donghyuk is just lucky he was able to find his group in the chaos. He can feel how loud the shop is just by the thickness of the air and the floor vibrating with everyone scrambling everywhere.  
“Why so busy? Mondays are never busy?” Donghyuk complains to the youngest of their group, Jisung, as he sits down with a pout on his face. “I’m supposed to know?” Jisung snarks with a small laugh. Jeno catches Jisung’s remark and sends him a look, making the boy stop.  
“Rumour is Mark is here. Don’t tell!” Jeno secretly finds it amusing that no one else in the shop knows sign. A secret language between their friend group (and the rest of the deaf population in America). 

Mark Lee is a very busy person, the fact that he somehow found the time to fit a visit to the coffee shop in between all the rehearsals and fan-meetings still surprised him. So here he was, sitting at a window table near the back, occasionally taking sips from his iced americano as he scrolled mindlessly through his twitter feed. He didn’t really have the ability to focus on stuff like that as he was thinking about his upcoming performance that was set to happen in the next few days. It was going to be his first concert in NYC and he didn’t want to disappoint any of his fans. Taking a quick pause from scrolling through the seemingly endless feed of tweets, Mark reached over to take another sip from his coffee, but as someone accidentally bumped into his chair it caused him to end up dropping the plastic cup. Before he could catch it, the cup hit the floor and the remains of his iced drink splashed all over the ground, drops getting onto his shoes and he watched in defeat as the coffee spread out into a puddle. He frowned as he stood up, looking around for napkins or something to help him clean up the mess he made. 

As eyes turned to look at the male who spilled his coffee (like a dumbass), only a few teenage girls and hyuk’s friends turned to look and gasp slightly. The older men and women didn’t care much, but the younger kids seem shocked. Jeno just smiled because he totally knew before everyone else, somehow. Hyuk definitely knew from the look in his friend’s eyes that there was something behind him he should know about. Hyuk silently begged to himself, please don’t be who i think it is… lo and behold, Chenle bumped into Mark Lee. Goddamnit. Hyuk quickly spins around in his chair to avoid any eye contact with the man. He can’t deal with that right now.

Jeno’s been learning speech, so he's confident enough as he stands up after grabbing 20 napkins and strutting his way towards the rapper. He’s one of the only boys in their friend group who have a cochlear implant, mostly because his parents have money, so he has 100% hearing in one ear only. Donghyuk silently curses again, Jeno needs to slow down before he embarrasses himself. 

Mark turned his attention from the spilled coffee on the floor towards the person walking towards him, napkins in tow. As the (presumably) younger male stopped in front of him, holding out the napkins, Mark flashed a quick, grateful smile as he accepted them. He crouched down to clean up the mess, his face flushed with embarrassment at the scene he caused. “Are you Mark? I won’t tell.” The young boy whispers in his broken english.

Turning to face the other, slight alarm flashed in his eyes as he debated whether or not to be honest. Deciding against lying, Mark nodded slightly as he whispered back a simple ‘yes,’ before turning his attention back to cleaning up the coffee, a displeased expression taking over his features as the coffee soaked through the napkins and got onto his hands. As a quick afterthought, Mark glanced at the other boy again before adding a ‘please don’t tell anyone.’

“I promise on my life.” Jeno smiles at him and goes to grab more napkins. Hyuk still isn’t looking at the interactions between his friend and the rapper. 

Mark took the rest of the napkins with a ‘thank you’ as he finally cleaned up the spilled drink. Before Jeno had a chance to leave and go back to his table, Mark stopped him with a slightly apologetic smile, “What’s your name?” Jeno felt his heart leap at the words, trying to find a correct sentence. “Jeno. I’m Jeno.” 

“Nice to meet you, Jeno,” Mark said in a soft voice as he reached out to shake Jeno’s hand, “Do you want me to buy you a coffee or something? As a thanks for helping me out,” he explained with a gentle smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling slightly. Of course, Jeno couldn’t say no. He felt himself smile like a big dummy and nod. “I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.” He figured he’d be getting harassed by his friends later over this, calling him a player or just crazy. 

Satisfied with the answer, Mark nodded and loosely held onto Jeno’s hand as he brought him to the line, scanning over the menu. Turning to Jeno, he gestured towards the array of items, “What do you want? You can get anything, it doesn’t matter,” Jeno tried to pick something reasonable and something that wouldn’t make him seem like a weirdo, as this is his idol whos offering him a coffee. He’s panicking, but he has to come off as cool like always. “Frozen coffee? I like those. With caramel.” He feels almost insecure with his less-than-perfect english, but he’s trying his best. 

Mark grinned and said a quick ‘of course’ as he turned to order the frozen coffee, adding on another americano for himself, praying to god that he wouldn’t spill this one all over the floor this time. After he paid for the drinks, he steered his attention towards Jeno again, “So, Jeno, tell me about yourself a little,” he said as he leaned back against the counter. 

Jeno sighed a little and tried to calm his insides. “Well… I’m Deaf. I can only hear out of my left when this is on.” He points to the hearing aid and the magnetic part that’s hidden under his hair. “My parents have me learn english so i’m not.. not stuck in one community, i guess.” Jeno was struggling not to sign as he spoke out of habit. 

Mark hummed in understandment, looking from the hearing aid back to Jeno’s eyes, “That makes sense,” and before he could say anything else, he has to turn to receive the now finished coffees, handing Jeno’s his respective order, “Where are you sitting?” he asked, eyes scanning the coffee shop, noticing with slight disappointment that his previously empty spot was now occupied by some business person.

“That big group of Deaf kids right there. They’re all staring if you hadn’t noticed yet.” Jeno tries not to laugh and shoots a finger at the salty boys he calls his friends. Hyuk is still hiding in his hoodie, to try and be less noticeable (he’s very noticeable). 

“Oh,” Mark smiled sheepishly as his face flushed with embarrassment again at noticing the group of boys staring at him and Jeno, “I notice now,” he couldn’t help but examine the group, his attention caught by the boy who was trying to hide in his hoodie. He tried subtly pointing at him as he glanced at Jeno, “Who’s that one?”

“The one trying to hide? That’s Donghyuk. He’s… shy. I don’t think he wants to be here today, honestly.” Jeno fantasises about pulling Donghyuk’s hoodie off his face and making him look at Mark, but he’s not that bad of a friend.

“Donghyuk? Seems cute,” Mark said offhandedly as he shifted on his feet, an idea forming in his mind, “Hey, Jeno, you mind if I come sit by you guys? It seems like my seat was taken by someone,” he gestured towards his old window spot with his free hand, “If not, it’s fine,”

“Of course you can sit with us! There’s always room for more. What’s better than gaining a new group of friends, right?” Only the downside is Jeno was the only one who could really speak english. He decided he can just translate if it comes to that. Jeno takes Mark’s hand again to lead him over to the table, not because he just wanted to hold his hand again. 

Mark flashed another one of his signature grins at Jeno as he lead him to the table, letting go of his hand as he sat in the free spot next to Donghyuk. He only felt a little bit nervous as he glanced around at the boys, holding his americano close to himself, “Mind introducing me to everyone, Jeno?”

Jeno smiled at Mark in his spot next to his best friend Jaemin, sitting up straight and hitting the table to get everyone’s attention. “Guys,” He starts, both speaking and signing, “This is Mark. He wants to be friends with us, right Mark?” 

“Of course,” Mark said with a nod, the grin from earlier still plastered to his face. He shot a quick look at Donghyuk next to him, before turning back to Jeno.

Jeno nods with a smile and throws a spoon at Donghyuk to make him look up, telling the other guys that Mark agrees. Donghyuk shoots up and angrily yells (signs) at Jeno, “Stop! You fuck!” before looking at Mark besides him and almost falling out of his chair of a heart attack. The others laugh at him as he tries to recover, holding his chest and looking at Mark again—is he real?? 

Startled by the sudden commotion of Donghyuk almost falling out of his chair next to him, he furrowed his eyebrows in concern, “Is he okay?” he asked Jeno as he examined Donghyuk, leaning in slightly closer.

“Oh he’s fine, he’s just a big chicken. Right hyuk?” Donghyuk didn’t have to know what he said in english to know it was insulting, so he glared at Jen and took a deep breath before looking at Mark with a gentler expression. “Hi.” He whispers. It’s practically the only thing he can say. He hopes Mark understands that he actually can’t speak, and jeno will have to translate for the rest of their time together. Poor Donghyuk felt his entire body shake as Mark got closer and closer, and from the looks of it, Mark’s lips read “cute” way too many times for his liking.

“He’s kinda cute,” Mark mused out loud, leaning in even closer to Donghyuk. He whispered back a small ‘hi’ as he waved, the smile on his face a little gentler than before. He examined the boy’s features, not bothering to cover up the fact he was obviously staring. Turning his attention to Jeno once again, Mark slung an arm across Donghyuk’s shoulders, “I like this one, he’s cute,”

Of course, Jeno was silently jealous, but he’s not letting that get in the way of their fun. Yet, it was really funny watching Hyuk shrink in gay fear as Mark wrapped an arm around him. “He thinks you’re cute, Hyuk. Give him your number?” Jeno laughs as Jisung and Chenle almost choke on their treats from laughing. Donghyuk doesn’t know how to react! 

Mark didn’t move his arm off from around Donghyuk’s shoulders, instead opting to pull him closer to him, scooting his chair over so they touched each other, “I don’t think he likes me,” Mark said jokingly with a fake pout, tilting his head toward’s Donghyuk.

Donghyuk is shaking so bad from the nerves and embarrassment of the situation that he almost can’t sign. “Jeno, you’re evil.” Donghyuk huffs and tries to accept that what’s happening right now doesn’t seem like it’s a plausible reality. Maybe he’s still asleep and not really awake right now. He’s just having a dream. A nightmare! But he doesn’t notice he had already taken out his phone and opened the notes so he could actually talk with Mark. 

**you’re bold** he writes.

Mark suppressed his laughter as he read what Donghyuk typed out, moving his arm off from around Donghyuk’s shoulders to instead take the boy’s phone, typing back a short message of his own: **maybe i am, or maybe you’re just really cute.**

****

****you can’t p o s s i b l y think i’m attractive. have you seen jeno? Didn’t you just buy him a coffee? Do you do this to all your fans??** **

**I’ve seen Jeno, but I think you’re cuter. I bought him a coffee because I spilled mine all over the floor and he helped me clean it up, it was just me being friendly.**

**does it bother you i’m Deaf?**

**Of course not, why would it?**

**because i can’t speak**

**I don’t mind that, at least we can still talk this way, can’t we?**

**yeah but jeno can speak english man and i’m the most deaf out of all them**

**That doesn’t really matter, I don’t have any problems with that, honestly. And it doesn’t matter much to me if Jeno can speak English and you can’t.**

Donghyuk sighs a little and looks up at Mark for a few seconds before looking at his phone again. **yknow it’s hard to be mad at u when you’re so nice but i’m gonna keep being mad at u**

**You’re a little stubborn, aren’t you? At least you’re still talking to me, even if you are mad.**

**ok i’m not really mad but i am startled by this whole situation. pinch me in case i’m actually asleep. also i demand i get your number.**

**That’s understable at least, and I know you’re not reallly mad at me. I won’t pinch you though, but i will**

and before he finished typing, Mark waited for Donghyuk to read what he said before leaning over and leaving a quick peck to Donghyuk’s cheek, typing his phone number into the boy’s phone as he leaned back in satisfaction. 

Donghyuk knows his entire face is red when he shuts off his phone and hides in his hoodie again for a complete new reason. And yes, Jeno is silently fuming. But he just laughs along with the other boys. 

Mark looked amused as he slid his arm around Donghyuk again, looking back at Jeno, “I think I broke him, sorry,”

“He breaks easily, don’t sweat it.” Jeno smiles and watches Donghyuk curl into Mark just to hide from the other guys. Mark smells good. Mark swears he felt his heart skip a beat, “He’s seriously so cute,” he said before looking around at everyone else, “So, who’re the rest of these guys?”

Jeno tears his eyes off of Donghyuk and smiles, looking at the other guys and signing their names as he says them. “Jisung, our youngest. Chenle, second youngest, Renjun, my best friend, Jaemin, my other best friend, and then me, jeno.” He smiles when he touches his cheeks, getting things thrown at him from the other guys and making him giggle.

Mark couldn’t help but laugh as he watched the boys throw stuff at Jeno, who seems perfectly content and use to this kind of stuff happening, “Well,” he managed between laughter, “It’s nice to meet you all,” as his laughter died down, he looked back at Donghyuk, “How long do you think he’s gonna stay like this?”

“Jisung says until you tell him to move.” Jen says for Jisung, who had somewhat heard Mark with his hearing aids. Donghyuk is just enjoying the vibrations of Mark’s voice. And the way he laughs is really cute as well, as hyuk felt the way he breathes when he laughed earlier. 

Looking up from Donghyuk, Mark smiled at Jisung, giggling slightly, “If I don’t say anything to him do you think we can just stay like this forever?”

Jaemin finds amusement in Mark’s statement, watching jeno carefully as he interprets well. “This guy, i like him. He’s funny. We teach him sign?” Jaem asks. “Jaemin wants to teach you sign. He says you’re funny.” 

“I’m down for that, and he really thinks I’m funny?” Mark seemed only a little surprised at that, looking at Jaemin with slightly wide eyes. Personally, he didn’t think he was that funny, but if other people did, then more power to him. 

Jaemin nods quickly with a smile, scanning his eyes over Mark a few times. He signs ‘funny’ and encourages Mark to copy. “Funny.” Jeno laughs a little. He fails to notice Donghyuk sitting up again, still leaning against the larger male. His cheeks didn’t stop burning.

Mark carefully copied Jaemin’s hand movements, repeating it a few times, “Did I do it right?” he looked from Jaemin to Jeno, and then slid his hand down to Donghyuk’s side to pull him closer, if it was even possible, “I feel like it looked funny when I did it,” Jeno and jaemin encourage Mark more as he seemed to be signing just fine, which was a good distraction for Jeno so he wouldn’t see Donghyuk in a puddle. 

Taking a break to take a sip of his americano, Mark tipped his head in thought for a brief moment, “How do you sign ‘sunshine?’” he asked as he absentmindedly rubbed circles into Donghyuk’s side with his thumb. In his head was just echos of “he's touching my hip” over and over again. Hyuk is so nervous, he doesn’t know how to handle himself. The smaller boy decides to give in and lean into Mark again, the comfort was in the affection he never got—especially from someone he just met. Could this be considered a hookup? Hyuk starts to worry. Jeno and Jaemin, however, smile and start excitedly showing Mark more signs, simply because they love showing others their culture and expressing their language through beautiful pictures by hand.

Mark had a genuine expression of joy on his face, his wide smile reaching all the way up to his eyes, which crinkled at the corners. It was nice to get to meet new people, which was something that rarely happened, his closest (and only) friends being two other popular artists, Johnny Seo and Jung Yunoh. After he felt like he got the hand of signing the word sunshine down, he hesitantly pried himself off of Hyuk and tapped his shoulder to get the younger boy to look at him. Hyuk flinches slightly and looks up at Mark with tired puppy eyes, giving him a questioning look. Once Mark had his attention, he signed out ‘sunshine’ and pointed at Hyuk, his own (more likely than not) cheesy way of calling the younger boy his sunshine.

Hyuk can’t stop from his cheeks getting pinker and pinker. This is a lot of stressful (lovely) attention. “This guy is clingy. Who invited him?” Hyuk complains but he smiles anyways. All the guys laugh and Jeno has no clue how he’s feeling anymore. “Hyuk thinks you’re clingy.” 

“I don’t have to be,” Mark said with a fake pout, crossing his arms against his chest, “I thought I was being cute,”

“Cute. So cute. I’m sorry.” Hyuk laughs a little and decides to lean against Mark again, hugging the larger’s arm just because he’s very comfy. He hopes he actually didn’t make the older sad or upset with him. That would be a shot to the head for hyuk. 

After a few moments, Mark couldn’t help but to break his facade, busting out into small giggles with a smile on his face again. He couldn’t even stay pretend upset with Hyuk for more than a few minutes, he already adored the younger boy. He can already imagine how much Johnny and Yunoh would be teasing him for this if they were here.

Donghyuk sat quietly (happily) next to Mark and pulled out his phone, adding the older’s number into a contact. He was debating on whether he should continue being stubborn or not, and then comparing the pros and cons of each side. He decides to send Mark’s number a message, just to make sure he’s not being fucked over. **royal loser mark uwu**

The vibration of his phone on the table startled him, causing Mark to jump slightly. He turned his phone face up, looking at the text notification from the strange number. Narrowing his eyes, the corner of his lips turned up slightly after he quickly figured out who the message was. He playfully poked Donghyuk in the side before shooting a quick text back, just a few words composed of: **sunshine baby hyuk** with an obnoxious amount of sun emojis after it. Hyuk gave him a light hit back and continued to look at his messages. He found it odd how they had already fell into a comfortable position together after only maybe twenty minutes. They were already dating in Hyuk’s head. 

Mark looked around at everyone, a fond smile on his face, “You guys are so much fun, I’m gonna be sad when I have to go,” as he said that, his hold on Hyuk tightened more, pulling him closer if it was even possible. The thought of this small break from seemingly endless rehearsals and chaos of his usual life was almost enough to completely erase the smile from his face.

All the boys gasped and started quickly asking for him to be added to their big group chat, shouting at Jeno to translate for them. It was so loud for poor jeno he was laughing while trying to calm them down. 

“They want to add you to our group chat so you don’t have to leave us.”

“Sounds good to me,” Mark couldn’t help but laugh along with the rest of the group, whose laughter seemed to be contagious. He almost felt bad for Hyuk who he kept moving as his body shook with laughter, but he pushed the feeling away when he saw a nearly identical expression of happiness on the younger’s face. The boy took it upon himself to add Mark to the group chat, as he was the one with his number. The small sense of pride as he clicked ‘add’ felt good. 

He decided that he is going to try and spend more time with Mark before A) he leaves for another country and B) his anxiety stops him from doing so.


End file.
